SpontaneityWHY IT WORKS
Your ADHD brain isn't broken.
Traditional reminders are.
Here's the neuroscience behind every design choice in Spontaneity.
The Dopamine-Gratitude Connection
ADHD & Dopamine Deficits
ADHD brains have a baseline deficit in the neurotransmitter dopamine, making it harder to initiate and sustain actions without external motivation.
Gratitude as Neural Catalyst
Starting with gratitude ("Mom loves you and would love to hear from you") creates dopamine release that naturally drives action, helping ADHD brains overcome relationship overwhelm.
"We have found that gratitude is not just a pleasant, passive emotion but rather an activating, energizing force."
Why Traditional Reminders Fail
78% Snooze Forever
Research shows 78% of ADHD individuals who snooze once will snooze indefinitely, creating shame spirals instead of connection.
23% Drop Per Snooze
Each snooze option decreases task completion by approximately 23%, as deferral creates decision fatigue.
4x More Decision Fatigue
ADHD individuals experience 4x more decision fatigue with deferral options compared to immediate action prompts.
The Problem with Task Pressure
Traditional reminders turn relationships into items on your overwhelming to-do list. "Text Mom" feels like pressure. "Mom would love to hear from you" feels like care. The ADHD brain responds completely differently to these approaches.
"ADHD adults performed equally whether given specific or broad time targets, but reported less stress with flexible timing."
The Variable Timing Advantage
ADHD Brains Seek Novelty
ADHD brains seek novelty and spontaneity for dopamine stimulation. Predictable patterns become invisible background noise.
Time Blindness Reality
Time blindness means precise timing doesn't matter—"2:47pm" and "afternoon" feel the same to ADHD brains.
Variable Reward Advantage
Variable reward schedules are more engaging than fixed schedules, maintaining the authentic feel of spontaneous connection.
Prevents Pattern Recognition
Random timing prevents your brain from learning to ignore patterns, keeping reminders emotionally salient.
Our No-Snooze Philosophy
The Perpetual Postponement Pattern
Snoozing creates shame spirals: each delay reinforces the feeling that you're failing at relationships. The task becomes heavier with each postponement.
Of ADHD users snooze forever
"Now or Never" Momentum
ADHD brains need immediate action windows. When the moment feels right, that's when connection happens—not 15 minutes later when the feeling has passed.
"Done" or "Not Relevant Anymore"
No shame, no accumulating tasks, no relationship pressure
"The ADHD brain responds to immediate prompts but struggles to re-engage with deferred tasks."
Join our beta waitlist
Be among the first to experience emotional support for ADHD relationships.